


Hold Me Down

by laurenkinn



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Crossroads Deals & Demons, Crossroads Demon Dean, Demon Dean, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-25
Updated: 2016-11-25
Packaged: 2018-09-02 04:01:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8650585
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/laurenkinn/pseuds/laurenkinn
Summary: When Castiel is diagnosed with stage four pancreatic cancer, he decides to try his hand at summoning a crossroads demon to heal him.  It ends up being a little more than he bargained for.





	

**Author's Note:**

> For a few months I've been toying with the idea of writing a fic based off each of Halsey's songs. This will be my first try. I hope you guys like it! Thanks for reading! <3
> 
> Side note: I may add more to this fic at some point. Please let me know if it sounds like a good idea!

I can feel the wind on my neck, a chill to the air, the night sleepless and watchful as I stare down at the freshly packed dirt at my feet and wonder, too late, what I was thinking. It doesn’t matter that I can feel myself getting weaker day by day, the cancer spreading through my body like wildfire in a forest that’s never seen rain. I never should have done this. It was a horrible idea.

I slowly look up and spin in a half circle, almost afraid to see anything other than the miles of open land around me. My car’s engine quietly hums a few yards away, a reminder that I don’t plan on being here long. I wonder if I should just walk away. Could I? I find myself completely unsure how this kind of thing normally works and mentally slap myself for jumping in without doing research first.

“Come on, Cas,” I berate myself softly, kicking the dirt and pulling my coat closer around me. “What are you doing?”

“I can tell you what you _could_ be doing,” a voice behind me quips. I jump and nearly trip over my own feet in my hurry to turn around.

“What?” I blurt, blinking rapidly, then promptly choke on my own spit. Coughing, eyes watering, I hold up a hand in a universal ‘give me just a second’ gesture while I rest my other hand on my knee.

“Hey man, you’re not supposed to die _now_ ,” the voice says, and I hear footsteps coming my way. I look up as my cough subsides and realize that I am in way over my head. The guy standing in front of me is, without a doubt, the most attractive person I’ve ever laid eyes on. He looks like he’s dressed to impress, in what appears to be a black pair of jeans and a black silk shirt. His hair is dirty blonde, gelled into some sort of half-spiky/half-slicked style. I look into his eyes and just see a normal green color, but they’re electric. He gives my entire body a thrill, followed by hesitation and doubt.

“What do you mean, I’m not supposed to die _now_?” I ask suspiciously. He chuckles. “Come on, Castiel,” he chides, starting to walk a slow circle around me. “We both know why you’re here.” I swallow.

“And why is that?” I ask, slightly breathlessly. “And how do you know my name?” I add, even though I know the truth. I didn’t bury that box in the middle of a crossroads just for the joy of it, but some part of me had hoped it wouldn’t work. That the rumors were made up. That I’d be able to laugh this whole thing off tomorrow morning then die in a few weeks like a normal person.

“Castiel,” the man says, and his voice is deep and dark and so incredibly sexy that I feel my knees turning into goo. He stops circling me and stands in front of me, mere inches away. “You know how I know your name. And you know who I am. Don’t play coy with me.” He reaches up and cradles my chin in his hand. “Look at me.”

I exhale shakily and raise my eyes to meet his. My heart nearly jumps through my throat when I’m met not with those dazzling green eyes from before, but with dark red bulbs. They seem to absorb all the light around them and crush it until it’s gone. “What are you?” I whisper.

“Isn’t it obvious?” he replies, letting go of my chin. I avert my eyes from his. I know he notices from the dark chuckle he gives. “I’m a demon. Now usually I don’t bother myself with crossroads. Dirty work, not for me.” He starts to circle me again. “But I just couldn’t help myself.”

“What do you mean?” I question. Then, feeling brave, “if you don’t like coming to crossroads, then why don’t you just leave?”

I start when he laughs heartily.

“Oh, Castiel, I don’t think you want me to do that,” he says. “See, I know what’s happening to you. I know what’s happening to your body. It’s eating you up. I mean, dude, you look like shit. Have you even told your family?”

I feel sudden anger swelling up inside me. “Why does it matter if I’ve told my family?” I spit. “This is my decision. Not theirs, not anyone else’s. It doesn’t make a difference.”

“Whoa, man, simmer down. I’m not trying to piss you off. I’m just saying.” The man stops circling me once again and I can feel his horrible eyes burning into me. In my peripheral vision, I see him shrug. “If you don’t want my help, though, there’s nothing I can do.” He starts to walk away and panic wells in my chest.

“No, wait,” I plead. He stops walking and turns around halfway to look at me. I swallow. “You’re right,” I concede. “I don’t want you to leave. I need your help, I just don’t know what that means for me.” I look down at the ground awkwardly, unsure what to say next. Thankfully, he speaks for me.

“Here’s what I can do for you,” he starts, sauntering towards me. “I can heal you, nice and easy, and you’ll be cancer free for the rest of your life. But,” he stops in front of me, “it comes at a price.”

I laugh darkly. “A price?” I scoff. “What could be worse than what’s happening to me now?” I immediately regret asking, belatedly realizing that there is probably something much worse waiting for me if I make any kind of deal tonight.

“Oh, you would be surprised,” the man murmurs quietly. “But I’m not going to bore you with the details. Here’s what happens. You tell me you want to be healed, I say yes, you walk away brand new, and you live happily ever after for the next ten years. Then, once your ten years are up, I will personally come to collect you. How does that sound?”

I hesitate momentarily. This is all I’ve wanted for the past six months, ever since the doctors diagnosed me with stage four pancreatic cancer. I had declined the chemotherapy they offered. They weren’t even expecting me to live this long. They had given me two, three months at best. I had proven them wrong for three extra months beyond that, but the cancer was spreading. They knew it, I knew it, everyone knew except my family. My little sister, Anna, she didn’t even know.

_Anna_. I feel a pang in my gut at the thought of dying, leaving her confused and angry. I realize with sudden clarity that it’s now or never. I look up and meet the demon’s eyes.

“Yes, let’s do it,” I agree.

“Wonderful!” he exclaims. “I’ll just need to seal the deal.”

I hold out my hand. “What do we do? Shake on it?”

“Oh, no,” the man replies. “Crossroads deals are sealed with a kiss.” He smiles, and it’s simultaneously terrifying and beautiful. My heart flips in my chest painfully.

“Okay,” I whisper. I take a small step forward, still looking into the demon’s eyes. Swiftly, he closes the rest of the distance between us, just a few steps, and reaches up to rest his fingers on the nape of my neck. I flinch.

“Come on, Cas, don’t be scared of me,” he purrs. I feel his fingers stroking under my hair line. They’re soft, which somehow comes as a shock to me. Like maybe this thing is more human than I thought before. I swallow loudly, then nod. My eyes flutter shut as he leans in, then his lips brush mine lightly.

Colors explode behind my eyelids. My knees become weak and I instinctively reach up and grab on to his shoulders for balance. He smiles against my mouth and the hand behind my neck tightens, pulling me closer. A noise rises up from somewhere deep within me and I’m surprised by how animalistic it sounds, something between a moan and a growl. I open my mouth and his tongue sweeps inside, exploring, tasting. It feels like heaven. Then, just as quickly as it had begun, it’s over. His lips leave mine and the hand stroking the back of my neck disappears too. I suddenly feel empty inside, and the technicolor dance behind my eyelids fizzles out. For a moment I stand there, eyes closed, lips parted. Waiting, maybe. Hoping he’ll come back and give me one more kiss. One more caress. Anything. But when I open my eyes, he’s gone, and all that’s left of him is the memory of his soft lips awakening every nerve ending in my body.

I inhale deeply, and realize belatedly that for the first time in months I can take a deep breath without a twinge of pain here, a stabbing sensation there. Tears gather in my eyes and I take a moment to savor the feeling of newness flowing through me, but also to mourn the feeling of loss.

When I finally walk to my car, the ghost of his touches dancing on my skin, I think I see a dark red glow coming from underneath a thicket of trees just out of the range of my headlights; but when I look closer, I see nothing, and I get into my car quickly. As I put my car into gear and begin to drive away, I take one last glance into my rearview mirror and see a shadowy figure standing in the middle of the crossroads. My hopeful heart skips a beat and my eyes flick back to the road ahead of me before returning to the mirror. This time, there’s nothing there.

“Fuck,” I exhale, continuing to drive. I don’t look back again.

 

 

The car drives away, slowly at first, then gathers speed and eventually disappears from sight. The demon watches until he can’t see it anymore. With a smile, he vanishes. He knows this will not be the last he sees of Castiel.


End file.
